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Feb. 28th, 2007 10:01 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
innerslytherinHello everyone, ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
thesnapelyone here filling in for IS tonight as she is currently ineptly wrestling with killer_the_cat's computer (and losing pathetically, I might add). Anyway, as she trusts me entirely too much, she's asked me to post part 1 of this HP Quills for a Cause fic that is titled 'Ew Tonks' in Google Docs & Spreadsheets. I can't imagine that is the final title she wants to give it, but as she hasn't provided another (ETA: Oh yes she has), there you have it.
Hold on, I'm just going to let this go to my head a moment. *breathes deeply*
Let's see, she's got five unread messages... look at all those options up there... Oh my god, the things I could do right now...
Oh wait, supposed to be posting, right. *clears throat* Without further ado, I shall endeavour to write up a nice bit for it. So goodnight, everyone. *waves to a strange and unfamiliar friends list*
Title: Probably not 'Ew Tonks'
Title: Permanently Off the Market [as was just texted to me]
Author:innerslytherin
Pairing: Looks like we got some past Remus/Severus, probably some future Remus/Severus, some unrequited Tonks crushing, a bit where Remus nearly kisses Kingsley but I think that was in jest, Kingsley/His Wife, The Order/Gossip...
Rating: Pretty tame thus far. Mentions to vague past shagging, so I'd say it's probably just a PG-13
Summary: So far, Remus is running away from Tonks and waxing nostalgic about all the ways he and Severus used to shag, while the Order mills around gossiping like a dozen old wiry-haired women who live in Florida and have like, welcome mats with a Dachshund in cowboy boots and bird houses that look like pink caravans and nothing better to do than stand around for a good chin-wag over the younger members' love lives. Yes, I have a feeling I'm more amused by my Order metaphor than interested in writing a decent summary. Which isn't to say that I don't care about writing a decent summary, but I suck at summaries, and I am not IS, so I don't know where this fic is going exactly.
Permanently Off the Market
Tonks' hair was the drabbest colour Remus had ever seen it. "If you would just listen--"
He cut her off mid-protest and shook his head again. "Nymphadora, we've already had this conversation--I am too old for you. I haven't the slightest interest in becominig romantically involved with a girl nearly young enough to be my daughter. Not to mention the fact that I am busy infiltrating the werewolves on Dumbledore's behalf. I haven't the time to begin a relationship."
"Remus--"
"This is my last word on it. I don't like hurting you, Nymphadora, particularly as you are my dear friend's cousin, but it would be like starting a romance with Harry. I can't even stand to think of it."
Tonks stared at him, her eyes and mouth little circles. "With--Merlin, Remus, that's a bit different!"
Remus gazed steadily at her. "Not for me, it isn't," he said, his voice quiet. He turned and left the kitchen and glared at the three Weasleys and one Auror who were eavesdropping on the row.
"We're finished now," he said, letting a hint of acid creep into his voice. "So if you were waiting for your tea, you won't have to."
Not that any of them were waiting for their tea. It was worse than a bloody whorehouse, the way people gossiped around here. Molly, he knew, would be bustling upstairs to write an owl to Bill, informing him that he needn't marry that French hussy, because Tonks was free. In a moment George would strut into the kitchen and offer to comfort Tonks. And Ginny--well, he didn't want to think about why Ginny was listening in. Either because her schoolgirl crush on him had never died, or because she had developed a new crush on Tonks. He suspected the latter, but he wasn't going to get involved.
Kingsley clapped a hand against Remus' shoulder. "Tough luck, mate," he said. "She'll never give up, you know."
Remus rolled his eyes. "Perhaps I ought to snog someone else in front of her to prove I like blokes better than birds," he muttered. He eyed Kingsley speculatively.
The big black man held up both hands. "Not me, mate. My wife would kill me."
Remus chuckled. This whole situation could have been avoided if he'd only been more open about his past. Then again, Severus might have murdered him if he'd been more open about his past.
Speak of the devil. As Remus walked past the door to the library, the tall potions master appeared. He leaned casually against the door jam, folding his arms across his lean chest.
"I could hear the two of you going at it all the way in here," he said dryly. "Perhaps you should just inform Miss Tonks that you are permanently off the market."
Remus stopped walking and turned to face Severus, lifting one eyebrow in an expression of polite curiosity that he had learned from Severus himself. He folded his arms across his chest, mirroring Severus' stance. "Should I?"
"It would shut her up."
That provoked a small laugh. "Yes, and send the Order Gossip Mill into a tailspin," he agreed. "Though it has been a bit boring around here lately."
Severus gave a small shrug and disappeared back into the library.
Remus went for a walk, but the conversation lingered in his mind.
***
"I've told you before, I'm too old, too poor--" Too gay, suggested his subconscious.
Tonks didn't care. She siezed the front of his robes and shook him to prove how much she didn't care. Anger flared up inside him, but he just refused to meet her eyes. This wasn't the time or the place to debate it. Dumbledore was dead.
***
"It was a lovely ceremony," Remus said politely to Molly. He knew she was about to start in on him about when he would be needing her help planning his own wedding. He gave her a tight smile and caught someone's eye.
"Oh, Kingsley! There you are! I needed to talk to you about the security at Headquarters." He caught up to Kingsley and grabbed his arm tightly. "Save me!" he hissed.
Kingsley laughed and nodded for Remus to follow him over to the table his wife, Tabitha, was sharing with Hestia Jones and Elphias Doge.
"Sooner or later, you're going to have to tell everyone," Kingsley said. He shook his head. "You shouldn't have to hide being gay any more than you hide being a werewolf. Not from this lot, anyway."
Remus sighed. "Some day," he said.
***
They'd been happy together, in the days leading up to the Potters' deaths. When Remus turned his back on England, he'd tried to turn his back on Severus, as well, but his gawky, angry lover wouldn't allow it. Severus spent time and energy on hexes and tracking spells and sent letters every few days. Angry letters, accusing letters, even, finally, pleading letters, reached Remus, delivered each time by a disgruntled and moulty owl.
Remus was working in Portugal, the summer of 1982. Severus came to him there and they spent two months having desperate sex and telling themselves the world hadn't ended. During the summer of 1983 Remus was on the southern coast of Spain. Severus gathered potions ingredients and called Remus names while they shagged. The summer of 1984 was a good one--they were in Greece, and Remus was working on a fishing boat, and Severus discovered a propensity for making love under the moonlight on the beach.
The summer of 1985 Severus hadn't come to him. The letters had been growing infrequent over the months leading up to the summer holidays, and three weeks into July Remus decided Severus wouldn't be there. He had a bad full moon and woke up with blood all over him and no memory of what had happened. He left Turkey in the middle of the night and headed further east. After another two weeks, he broke the tracking spell on the dragonfang pendant Severus had given him.
He hadn't seen Severus from 1985 until 1993, when he received a letter from Dumbledore explaining that Sirius had escaped from Azkaban, and Remus was needed to lure him back into captivity. Why not? Remus needed a job, and Hogwarts would provide shelter and meals, as well. He wrote back to Dumbledore, accepting the position.
He and Severus hadn't rekindled their relationship. Remus was polite to his face and watched him when he wasn't looking. Severus was unfailingly rude to him and finally outed him as a werewolf.
***
He knew in his heart that Severus couldn't really be a traitor. Even when Rodolphus and Rabastan Lestrange were recaptured, and fingered Severus as Voldemort's chief lieutenant, Remus couldn't believe Severus had truly murdered Dumbledore with hateful intent, couldn't believe Severus would betray everything they had stood for.
The first war had been desperate and angry. The second war was sorrowful and weary. Remus and Severus had spent many long nights of research and planning in the library, sharing the fire and the Firewhiskey, and occasionally slipping into personal conversation. It was comfortable.
Sirius hadn't liked it, of course. He'd groused about how chummy Remus and Severus were getting. He'd made rude (though mostly true) remarks about Severus' personal hygiene. He'd encouraged Harry, with every action, to disobey and disrespect Severus. Remus hadn't been able to do much to either shut Sirius up or counteract his influence with Harry.
Sirius wasn't the only one who had noticed. In a moment of weakness, brought on by pain, exhaustion, and Firewhiskey, Remus had confided to Kingsley his past relationship and lingering feelings for Severus. As far as he knew, Kingsley had never betrayed his confidence, though he did frequently prod Remus to do something about how he felt.
In the end, there hadn't been time. Remus had been sent to the werewolves just after Sirius was killed, and Severus was called more and more to Voldemort's side. They had exchanged a few hastily-jotted notes, but aside from that, they had very little contact. The week before the Battle of Hogwarts Severus had sent Remus a note saying Dumbledore wanted Remus to begin taking the Wolfsbane Potion again. Severus had managed to neutralise the scent, and claimed that the feral wolves wouldn't be able to detect that Remus was taking it.
Three weeks after Dumbledore's death, an owl had arrived with a vial attached to its leg. Remus had stared at the murky green liquid for a good five minutes, then downed it. He hadn't been poisoned, and he hadn't lost his mind at the full.
thesnapelyone here filling in for IS tonight as she is currently ineptly wrestling with killer_the_cat's computer (and losing pathetically, I might add). Anyway, as she trusts me entirely too much, she's asked me to post part 1 of this HP Quills for a Cause fic that is titled 'Ew Tonks' in Google Docs & Spreadsheets. I can't imagine that is the final title she wants to give it, but as she hasn't provided another (ETA: Oh yes she has), there you have it.Hold on, I'm just going to let this go to my head a moment. *breathes deeply*
Oh wait, supposed to be posting, right. *clears throat* Without further ado, I shall endeavour to write up a nice bit for it. So goodnight, everyone. *waves to a strange and unfamiliar friends list*
Title: Permanently Off the Market [as was just texted to me]
Author:
innerslytherinPairing: Looks like we got some past Remus/Severus, probably some future Remus/Severus, some unrequited Tonks crushing, a bit where Remus nearly kisses Kingsley but I think that was in jest, Kingsley/His Wife, The Order/Gossip...
Rating: Pretty tame thus far. Mentions to vague past shagging, so I'd say it's probably just a PG-13
Summary: So far, Remus is running away from Tonks and waxing nostalgic about all the ways he and Severus used to shag, while the Order mills around gossiping like a dozen old wiry-haired women who live in Florida and have like, welcome mats with a Dachshund in cowboy boots and bird houses that look like pink caravans and nothing better to do than stand around for a good chin-wag over the younger members' love lives. Yes, I have a feeling I'm more amused by my Order metaphor than interested in writing a decent summary. Which isn't to say that I don't care about writing a decent summary, but I suck at summaries, and I am not IS, so I don't know where this fic is going exactly.
Permanently Off the Market
Tonks' hair was the drabbest colour Remus had ever seen it. "If you would just listen--"
He cut her off mid-protest and shook his head again. "Nymphadora, we've already had this conversation--I am too old for you. I haven't the slightest interest in becominig romantically involved with a girl nearly young enough to be my daughter. Not to mention the fact that I am busy infiltrating the werewolves on Dumbledore's behalf. I haven't the time to begin a relationship."
"Remus--"
"This is my last word on it. I don't like hurting you, Nymphadora, particularly as you are my dear friend's cousin, but it would be like starting a romance with Harry. I can't even stand to think of it."
Tonks stared at him, her eyes and mouth little circles. "With--Merlin, Remus, that's a bit different!"
Remus gazed steadily at her. "Not for me, it isn't," he said, his voice quiet. He turned and left the kitchen and glared at the three Weasleys and one Auror who were eavesdropping on the row.
"We're finished now," he said, letting a hint of acid creep into his voice. "So if you were waiting for your tea, you won't have to."
Not that any of them were waiting for their tea. It was worse than a bloody whorehouse, the way people gossiped around here. Molly, he knew, would be bustling upstairs to write an owl to Bill, informing him that he needn't marry that French hussy, because Tonks was free. In a moment George would strut into the kitchen and offer to comfort Tonks. And Ginny--well, he didn't want to think about why Ginny was listening in. Either because her schoolgirl crush on him had never died, or because she had developed a new crush on Tonks. He suspected the latter, but he wasn't going to get involved.
Kingsley clapped a hand against Remus' shoulder. "Tough luck, mate," he said. "She'll never give up, you know."
Remus rolled his eyes. "Perhaps I ought to snog someone else in front of her to prove I like blokes better than birds," he muttered. He eyed Kingsley speculatively.
The big black man held up both hands. "Not me, mate. My wife would kill me."
Remus chuckled. This whole situation could have been avoided if he'd only been more open about his past. Then again, Severus might have murdered him if he'd been more open about his past.
Speak of the devil. As Remus walked past the door to the library, the tall potions master appeared. He leaned casually against the door jam, folding his arms across his lean chest.
"I could hear the two of you going at it all the way in here," he said dryly. "Perhaps you should just inform Miss Tonks that you are permanently off the market."
Remus stopped walking and turned to face Severus, lifting one eyebrow in an expression of polite curiosity that he had learned from Severus himself. He folded his arms across his chest, mirroring Severus' stance. "Should I?"
"It would shut her up."
That provoked a small laugh. "Yes, and send the Order Gossip Mill into a tailspin," he agreed. "Though it has been a bit boring around here lately."
Severus gave a small shrug and disappeared back into the library.
Remus went for a walk, but the conversation lingered in his mind.
***
"I've told you before, I'm too old, too poor--" Too gay, suggested his subconscious.
Tonks didn't care. She siezed the front of his robes and shook him to prove how much she didn't care. Anger flared up inside him, but he just refused to meet her eyes. This wasn't the time or the place to debate it. Dumbledore was dead.
***
"It was a lovely ceremony," Remus said politely to Molly. He knew she was about to start in on him about when he would be needing her help planning his own wedding. He gave her a tight smile and caught someone's eye.
"Oh, Kingsley! There you are! I needed to talk to you about the security at Headquarters." He caught up to Kingsley and grabbed his arm tightly. "Save me!" he hissed.
Kingsley laughed and nodded for Remus to follow him over to the table his wife, Tabitha, was sharing with Hestia Jones and Elphias Doge.
"Sooner or later, you're going to have to tell everyone," Kingsley said. He shook his head. "You shouldn't have to hide being gay any more than you hide being a werewolf. Not from this lot, anyway."
Remus sighed. "Some day," he said.
***
They'd been happy together, in the days leading up to the Potters' deaths. When Remus turned his back on England, he'd tried to turn his back on Severus, as well, but his gawky, angry lover wouldn't allow it. Severus spent time and energy on hexes and tracking spells and sent letters every few days. Angry letters, accusing letters, even, finally, pleading letters, reached Remus, delivered each time by a disgruntled and moulty owl.
Remus was working in Portugal, the summer of 1982. Severus came to him there and they spent two months having desperate sex and telling themselves the world hadn't ended. During the summer of 1983 Remus was on the southern coast of Spain. Severus gathered potions ingredients and called Remus names while they shagged. The summer of 1984 was a good one--they were in Greece, and Remus was working on a fishing boat, and Severus discovered a propensity for making love under the moonlight on the beach.
The summer of 1985 Severus hadn't come to him. The letters had been growing infrequent over the months leading up to the summer holidays, and three weeks into July Remus decided Severus wouldn't be there. He had a bad full moon and woke up with blood all over him and no memory of what had happened. He left Turkey in the middle of the night and headed further east. After another two weeks, he broke the tracking spell on the dragonfang pendant Severus had given him.
He hadn't seen Severus from 1985 until 1993, when he received a letter from Dumbledore explaining that Sirius had escaped from Azkaban, and Remus was needed to lure him back into captivity. Why not? Remus needed a job, and Hogwarts would provide shelter and meals, as well. He wrote back to Dumbledore, accepting the position.
He and Severus hadn't rekindled their relationship. Remus was polite to his face and watched him when he wasn't looking. Severus was unfailingly rude to him and finally outed him as a werewolf.
***
He knew in his heart that Severus couldn't really be a traitor. Even when Rodolphus and Rabastan Lestrange were recaptured, and fingered Severus as Voldemort's chief lieutenant, Remus couldn't believe Severus had truly murdered Dumbledore with hateful intent, couldn't believe Severus would betray everything they had stood for.
The first war had been desperate and angry. The second war was sorrowful and weary. Remus and Severus had spent many long nights of research and planning in the library, sharing the fire and the Firewhiskey, and occasionally slipping into personal conversation. It was comfortable.
Sirius hadn't liked it, of course. He'd groused about how chummy Remus and Severus were getting. He'd made rude (though mostly true) remarks about Severus' personal hygiene. He'd encouraged Harry, with every action, to disobey and disrespect Severus. Remus hadn't been able to do much to either shut Sirius up or counteract his influence with Harry.
Sirius wasn't the only one who had noticed. In a moment of weakness, brought on by pain, exhaustion, and Firewhiskey, Remus had confided to Kingsley his past relationship and lingering feelings for Severus. As far as he knew, Kingsley had never betrayed his confidence, though he did frequently prod Remus to do something about how he felt.
In the end, there hadn't been time. Remus had been sent to the werewolves just after Sirius was killed, and Severus was called more and more to Voldemort's side. They had exchanged a few hastily-jotted notes, but aside from that, they had very little contact. The week before the Battle of Hogwarts Severus had sent Remus a note saying Dumbledore wanted Remus to begin taking the Wolfsbane Potion again. Severus had managed to neutralise the scent, and claimed that the feral wolves wouldn't be able to detect that Remus was taking it.
Three weeks after Dumbledore's death, an owl had arrived with a vial attached to its leg. Remus had stared at the murky green liquid for a good five minutes, then downed it. He hadn't been poisoned, and he hadn't lost his mind at the full.
